


Fights You Don't Pick

by whiplashcrash



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: KAW 2020, Kallus is majorly insecure, M/M, an X-wing picks a fight with Zeb, it's hard to keep things secret from the gossipy Intelligence branch of the Rebellion, socks in bed Kallus rights, surprises don't always go well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:35:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24079870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whiplashcrash/pseuds/whiplashcrash
Summary: If you're in a busy hangar filled with a rag tag group of rebels and a couple half blown to pieces x-wings, you should be paying attention to your surroundings. It's only common sense, after all. Or, perhaps not as common as Kallus would prefer, and Zeb's aching head for that matter, too. But out of everything he could've chosen to lose a fight with, a fighter would not have been Zeb's nor Kallus's first choice.
Relationships: Alexsandr Kallus/Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios
Comments: 14
Kudos: 81
Collections: Kalluzeb appreciation week 2020.





	Fights You Don't Pick

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sempaiko](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sempaiko/gifts).



> For Kalluzeb Appreciation Week, Day 2: End of the War  
> It's super late, but it is what it is, and I just wanted it to be a quality fic, because the state it was in on Day 2 was not something I could be proud of. Decided to add a bit at the end as a nod to Kallus VS the X-wing by Sempaiko. I hope you like it, Semp!

Endor, for Zeb, was the end. Of course, the remnants of the Empire raged past the death of Palpatine, and for a good while too. But Zeb couldn’t bring himself to look at it that way. 

It was the last battle that mattered, he decided. The rest were just follow ups, confirmation of what they already knew. The war was over, and so they were over.

The end meant one more thing. It meant Zeb was leaving. 

Of course, everyone understood. They’d all fought a good fight, and although he’d loved sticking it to the Empire, his path diverged from the one many of his longtime friends and comrades were walking. Zeb wasn’t the only one, he knew, but he wasn’t sure if the only other person in the galaxy he wanted to ask would quit what he loved for Zeb.

Zeb knew logically, of course, he would survive, even if it would be difficult to mask his grief. Irrational grief, because Kallus was still alive. They were both alive and had survived the Battle of Endor. There was still work to be done, however, and Kallus would step up to take arguably more than his fair share of it. The abyss of intelligence gathering and tactical plans swallowed Kallus alongside the fractured Empire and what was left of the Imperial fleet.

As each day passed after the Battle of Endor, Zeb found himself torn. Did he continue to wriggle his way into Kallus’s arms while he still could, or did he brace himself for the beginning of the Republic, a Republic without Kallus? 

He started small. A piece of clothing here, an extra blaster cartridge there. For every item of Zeb’s aboard the Ghost in his quarters Zeb managed to collect, three more from assorted locations joined them in his case. After about a week of slowly gathering his things, everything was tucked away in his own personal quarters on board the smally homely freighter.

It was then he remembered he’d forgotten his blasted charm. It was ridiculous, ancient superstition, and though Zeb had sworn he’d made a note to retrieve it, he’d somehow forgotten.

The first thing Zeb did when he woke up was try and look for Kallus. 

But the second thing Zeb did was make a trip to the by medical bay after being hit in the head.

The culprit was a free swinging s-foil that had been removed from a mangled x-wing but not entirely secured by the cables it was hanging from. A stray gust of wind (was it wind if it was a rush of air from another x-wing taking off in the hangar? Zeb wondered vaguely) sent it flying in the direction of where Zeb was standing, and while he pushed Hera and Jacen out of the way, he hadn’t moved as quickly and he’d been hit on the return trip.

Kallus was busy. Zeb wasn’t sure with what, there had been talk along the lines of speaking to Hera about the navicomputer and charting star systems, none of which he felt required his presence. It was easy enough to make his way on and off the Ghost when there was no one present to hold him up with chatter or dangle food in front of the monster named Guilt. 

Amidst the chaos of rebels running to and from the various ships of what was left of the Rebellion’s fleet, now the New Republic’s fleet, Zeb reminded himself, it was easy to get swept up and distracted.

Which was what happened when Zeb entered the hangar and saw Hera shouting at one of the technicians who had been working on the Ghost. At her side was Jacen, green hair falling in his eyes and fingers clutching the pant leg of Hera’s jumpsuit.

“You clumsy, half-witted sloppy idiot! What if my son hadn’t been with me when that happened? The Ghost isn’t just some ship you can do whatever you want to and leave the mess for someone else to fix up. If you’re doing work on my ship, you need to have either me or Chopper supervising so something like this doesn’t happen.”

“Woah, Hera,” Zeb stepped in between the cowering technician and the furious twi’lek with a score to settle. “It’s okay. Jacen is fine. You’re both fine, and we can fix the Ghost. Relax. I’ll help you, and Chopper will be my backup, alright?”

“Zeb, you were supposed to be leaving next week.”

“I can leave later. It’ll be fine. It’s just a couple of extra days, and I have to talk to…” Zeb’s entire expression changed in a matter of seconds

Hera turned over her shoulder to see one of the s-foils, removed from a badly burned x-wing, freed of the cables holding it in place in the air and flying towards where they were standing. Shoving Hera and Jacen away and underneath the Ghost along with the mechanic, Zeb attempted to duck under, but the s-foil clipped Zeb’s head. He tripped over a crate, tumbling behind the supplies intended for their trip with a surprised shout.

Kallus shouted from where he’d ducked behind cover not too far away. “Zeb!” Hera saw a horrified ex-Imperial pushing himself off the hangar floor with a grimace, but he was on his feet in an instant, barreling towards where the Lasat had vanished from their sight.

Hera was entirely focused on her son. “Are you okay?” She asked, holding his face, and with her other hand taking one of his smaller hands in hers. He looked horrified, but Jacen wasn’t bleeding anywhere she could see. After ensuring Jacen was uninjured aside from a few scrapes and future bruises, Hera abandoned the petrified moron mechanic without a second thought, and crawled out from underneath the Ghost with Jacen in hand. 

Kallus slipped over the crate that had swept Zeb’s feet out from underneath him to kneel besides a now unconscious and bleeding Lasat. Stuffing his green jacket under Zeb’s head, Kallus’s hands remained swift, but steady, and he shouted over his shoulder for a medic. 

Hera echoed the command, but didn’t follow Kallus. She pulled Jacen into a hug to keep his young eyes away from his injured uncle. 

“I came to see Zeb.” Kallus said worriedly. “What happened?”

Hera sighed, patting Jacen’s head gently. “What always happens. Zeb is a self-sacrificing noble you-know-what.”

Jacen smiled up at Kallus, and he returned a gentle smile down at the youngest of the Spectres. 

“Well, Zeb and I have been meaning to talk to you-”

“I actually have something I need to do, but maybe later.” Kallus shrugged, patting Jacen on the head. 

“Oh, alright then.” 

Kallus spared anothing longing look at Zeb, and after narrowly avoiding the same s-foil pendulum at about eye-level, Kallus disappeared into the jungle of work crews and blow-torch sparks without another word.

* * *

The doctors fretted over Zeb, and Hera had torn both the reckless pilot and mechanic responsible for overseeing the fighter’s repairs a new one. Jacen informed Zeb after he woke up in the medical bay that Kallus had come to the hangar just in time to see him hit by the kriffing thing, although Zeb had no recollection of as much. 

Jacen also informed Zeb that Uncle Alex visited him in the medical bay, but hadn’t been able to stay because of some sort of last-minute mission briefing he couldn’t get out of.

Neither Jacen nor Zeb blamed Kallus for having to leave; Jacen was already done with all the nonsense adults had to deal with at the ripe age of five years old, and Zeb knew that as the war was winding down, Kallus was just as needed as ever. 

He understood it, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. “Hey, Jacen,”

Jacen perked up with a grin. “Yeah Uncle Zeb?”

“What do you think of Uncle Alex?”

He paused, placing his small toy droid on the bedside table next to Zeb. “I think he’s busy,”

Zen rolled his eyes. “I mean,” He grunted as he sat up in his bed. “What do you think about him being busy.”

The five-year-old considered his answer carefully, trying and failing to do a serious thinking face. “I think it makes him sad when he isn’t with you.”

“Yeah, well, me too.” Zeb grunted as he pushed himself up in that medical bed. “Come on, come here.”

Jacen’s eyes widened in alarm and he rose from the floor in surprise. “Uncle Zeb, Momma’s gonna be mad if you don’t listen to the medical droids.”

Zeb waved his hand dismissively. “Your momma doesn’t have to know.” 

“But Uncle Alex knows!”

“Uncle Alex is working,”

“Actually, Uncle Alex is right here,” Kallus said, walking into the room with a grin on his face. “And he’s wondering if Jacen is sneaking his other uncle out of bed when he’s not supposed to.”

“No!” Jacen shook his head furiously. “No, I told him not to get out of bed!”

“Did you now?” Alex stopped in front of the sheepish looking boy.

Alex was so good with kids, especially Jacen, it warmed Zeb despite the frigity of the cold medical ward on the star cruiser. “He did.” Zeb said, ruffling Jacen’s hair with a grin. “I just didn’t know when you were going to be back and wanted to come see you.”

“Great minds think alike, it seems. I came to speak with your Uncle Zeb.” 

Jacen perked up. “Really?”

“Yes, really. Jacen,” Alex crouched down in front of the young boy. “Your mother is waiting for you outside. She said something about a special treat for amazing nephews who take excellent care of their uncles.”

“Oh, thank you Uncle Alex!”

Alex laughed, settling down on the edge of Zeb’s bed. “Don’t thank me. Thank your mother.”

Jacen rushed through the room towards the open door, where none other than Hera herself leaned against the wall with a smile. “Momma!” 

Zeb watched the reunion with a smile; Jacen was beyond loveable, and Hera, as the wonderful mother she was, held his hand with a wide grin as they walked out the door.

Turning to look at Alex, Zeb saw his eyes still fixed on the mother and son pair. Alex sighed and reached to the side to take Zeb’s hand, one thumb brushing over the back of his palm. Zeb laughed. “You know, I’m sure if you ask Hera, she’ll let you go with them. I’ll stay here and in bed if you promise to come back.”

“Hmm?” Looking over his face with glassy eyes, Alex took a moment to formulate a response. Unusual, even when he was distracted. “Oh, no. No, Zeb, I’m fine.”

“You are not! Look at yourself, Alex,”

“I’m fine, Zeb!”

“Then why aren’t you smiling anymore?” Zeb frowned, sneaking his fingers in between Alex’s. 

“I’m smiling!” Alex said defensively, a half-smile cropping up on his face for him to offer Zeb over his shoulder, but it vanished as soon as Alex looked away. 

Zeb scoffed. “Karabast, go on.” He ruffled Alex’s hair fondly, but when he didn’t go after the Syndullas, Zeb raised an eyebrow. “Alex?”

Entranced, Kallus sighed with a shake of his head. He scoffed, hands thrown up in mock surrender. “I don’t even know why.”

“Know why what?”

“Why do I bother?” Kallus snapped. “Could you, for perhaps more than a day, not run around trying to get yourself killed? Is that so difficult, Garazeb? Why would you do something so reckless and endanger yourself like that?”

A sneaky grin cropped up on his face, and he reached to take Kallus’s hand again. “Ah, you know me. Can’t help myself. Danger is what I live for.”

Kallus pulled away. “You could have died, or been gravely injured Zeb. This isn’t something to joke about. You have a serious injury.”

 _Oh, so that’s what he’S going on about._ While he knew Kallus certainly meant well, his need to scratch whatever itch he had to shield Zeb from pain repeatedly got on the Lasat’s nerves. “I didn’t die. I had a plan!”

“Oh, in the half a klik you had to formulate a coherent thought with half a starfighter about to take your head off, you made a plan?” Scoffing in disbelief, brown eyes narrowed as Kallus searched for a flaw in Zeb’s story. Zeb could see the ISB in him putting up a fight against Kallus accepting the words at face value. “What was it? Sacrificing yourself like some ridiculous hero in a holovid?”

Oh, he meant well, but Kallus’s irritability seemed off from the usual worrying Zeb had expected from Kallus. He screwed this up rather fantastically. “I thought I could get all of us out of the way in time, I’m sorry.”

Kallus sighed. 

“You’re still angry.”

“Yes, I am still angry.”

“With me?” The Lasat’s ears folded. He struggled to search for the words that would reach through the fortresses that still stood around his Alex’s heart. Though they were old, and crumbling, it didn’t take much for his mind to take up arms against anything Alex was afraid could sneak through the gaping holes in stone walls to defend himself.

“With myself, Zeb.” Alex grimaced, searching for the blade Zeb knew from experience Alex feared would strike him if he didn’t keep his guard up. The vulnerability in Alex’s soft brown eyes only twisted up Zeb’s insides all the more. “Do you honestly think me selfish enough to not care? To not listen? How could I have made you feel this way?”

“I don’t think you’re selfish! Karabast, Alex, what’s wrong? Talk to me.” Zeb pleaded, seeing the pushy instinct Alex had to withdraw when he feared he was becoming too unguarded. It wasn’t without reason. Over two decades of being suffocated under the expectations of the elitist Coruscanti society had twisted Alexsandr’s ability to let others in enough it broke Zeb’s heart.

“I just,” Alex huffed a sigh, standing up and bracing himself at the foot of Zeb’s bed. “Were you planning on telling me you didn’t want to stay with the New Republic, or were you hoping you wouldn’t have to if the x-wing took you out first?”

“Of course, I was. Alex,” Zeb grimaced as he leaned upwards and took Kallus’s hand despite the skull-splitting pain he fought off. “I was going to tell you.”

“You were leaving! I didn’t even know you were gone until someone else told me you and Hera had planned a trip for next week, much less that you’d tendered your resignation.” Kallus snapped. “You didn’t tell me anything.”

“It was supposed to be a surprise, Alex,”

“Well, congratulations, it was certainly a surprise.” He mumbled, watching the floor with mild interest while the toe of his boot tapped it repeatedly.

“I should’ve known you’d find out.” Zeb said, and though the remark usually would have been the start of some playful banter between them, neither were up for it. “You’re in Intelligence, and it’s not for your pretty looks either. Now, look at me.”

Alex turned his head away instead, biting his lip with a look most would take to mean he was angry, but Zeb knew better. He was in pain, but more specifically, his Alex felt betrayed.

Zeb tossed aside his blankets and crawled across the bed to grasp both of his lover’s hands. Alex had a death grip on the edge of bed’s frame, and his knuckles were white. “Hey, now. We’re not here to fight. You didn’t tell me all this to get angry with me. Now, come on. Talk to me.” Zeb pleaded, being as gentle as he knew his Alex needed. “Please talk to me.”

With a hesitant nod, Alex rounded the bed again and sat down, kicking off his shoes before slipping sock-covered feet under the white sheets. He buried his face in the crook of Zeb’s arm, one arm thrown over the Lasat’s chest and the other reaching backwards to hold Zeb’s hand. 

Shaky breaths filled the air between them. Shaky breaths that belonged to Alex. He swallowed his looming insecurities and looked up at Zeb. “I don’t want to stay here without you.”

It was a noble gesture. Alexsandr Kallus was nothing if not self-sacrificing; more often than not to an extreme. “You don’t have to quit something you love for me.”

“And if I’m quitting for myself?” Alex asked.

“Then quit for yourself, but not for me.” Zeb said firmly. He traced the outline of Alex’s face. “Do you want to leave?”

Leaning into Zeb’s softer than he thought possible touch, Alex nodded. “With you? Of course, I do.” 

The tension in his voice was dissipating, but from his body language, despite being draped over Zeb, Kallus’s stress, perhaps anger, was still coiled around his spine, “But you’re still angry with me.” Zeb wasn’t going to push, but the question was clear. _Why?_

“In the Empire,” Alex trailed off, exhaling frustratedly. “They never told me everything. Sometimes not even things I needed to know. I know you’re independent, and your own person, but Zeb, I feel as if I needed to know you were planning on leaving.”

“I was going to tell you.” Zeb said. Alex sighed, adjusting himself in Zeb’s arms. “I’m telling you the truth.”

“I know you are. I know you are being honest, but I struggle with being in the dark, perhaps more than I’ve told you.” Alex’s breathy admission sent a pang and flinch through Zeb’s body. 

“Okay,” Zeb said, motioning for Alex to come back around to his side. He pat on the older tattered but sturdy blanket, and scooted over to the side so Alex would have enough room to sit. Zeb took both of his love’s hands in his own and nodded. “I wish I’d known that before, but I know it now, and that’s what matters. I’m telling you right now that I’m leaving in a week, or maybe two after all of this.” He gestured broadly

“You weren’t planning on leaving me behind?” The broken croak said more than most would’ve caught on. Zeb would’ve missed if it not for years of catching on the subtleties of his Alexsandr’s inflections and choice of words.

“Not a chance, Sasha.” 

“Right.” Alex nodded slowly, but his struggle to internalize the information was as clear as day.

“Hey,” Zeb’s free fingers snuck into those longer blond locks. “I’m not leaving you here. You’re coming with me.”

He sighed again, not quite meeting Zeb’s eyes; Alex was more than content to lay on Zeb’s broad chest without letting the entire ship know how kriffing vulnerable he was. “I wish I’d known you were unhappy here. I thought you loved the Rebellion.”

“I did. But the Empire’s gone now. The Rebellion is over. It’s the New Republic, and I don’t know about you, but I don’t care much for politics. I’m not unhappy, I just think there’re other things out there for us besides this.” Zeb said. “I don’t want to fight a war we already won.”

“So, you want to leave?” Alex asked.

“The only thing I want is you. Whether you have a fancy new job in the New Republic or not, it doesn’t matter.” Zeb smiled. “But, before you change your mind, I want to show you what it is I’m offering.”

A shy upturn of the corner of Alex’s mouth caught Zeb’s eye. “Oh, so you have another plan?” 

“Yeah, and this one’s been cooking for years, so don’t you go giving my grief about last-minute nonsense.” 

Alex’s eyebrows raised, but he couldn’t help the adoring look in his eyes, one exclusively for Zeb. “Years?”

Zeb nodded. “Yeah. What do you think? Can we try and give it a shot?”

A small chuckle, accompanied by a faint brush of Zeb’s velvet fine fur under his fingertips, hinted at Alex having pushed past his insecurities for the moment. “I think I quit already, so I don’t have much of a choice.”

“You quit?” Zeb asked incredulously.

Alex blushed, but nodded. “Yes. I told Command this morning before your, ah, incident,”

 _He’s teasing._ Zeb realized. It was a relief to hear. Although it wasn’t raw and open as their discussion had been, for him to be comfortable with shooting wisecracks back and forth was no small thing. “Very funny. Now laugh it up.”

“Never,” Alex swore, even as his face split into a smile from ear to ear. The same loose hair fell into his face as he shook his head, and he chuckled. “Whatever your plan is, I’ll follow it and you to the ends of the galaxy. I trust you.”

“Good. I’d hate to drag you there kicking and screaming and embarrass you in front of everyone in the Rebellion.”

With a mocking pensive look, Alex acted as if he were considering the idea for a moment. He shook his head and shrugged.“I can’t say I’d appreciate that,”

“No? Too bad.”

Alex laughed, shoving Zeb, with one half-hearted push of his hand. He climbed over Zeb, the awkward shuffle of limbs under the wrinkled sheets ending with one of his knees between Zeb’s thighs and the other knee on Zeb’s left side. 

Alex’s sock covered foot brushed against his leg, and Zeb resisted the urge to steal it off of him. Despite loving Alexsandr, unconditionally, Zeb was not a fan of human shoes, and less so of socks. Possibly for selfish reasons, he craved the skin to skin contact those kriffing socks got in the way of. 

With one hand pressing into the pillow by Zeb’s left ear, Alex beamed down at Zeb. He pulled off his left glove with his teeth, and switched hands.

“What’re you doing?” Zeb laughed as Alex pulled off his other glove and sprawled over top of Zeb’s muscular chest. 

“Getting comfy.” He explained, but each hand found some part of Zeb to hold into.

“Not that I’m complaining,” Zeb chuckled. “But why?”

Alex snorted, but pressed a small kiss to Zeb’s mouth amidst the Lasat’s laughter. “So you don’t go picking fights with x-wings,” he murmured in the almost nonexistent space between them.

“It was half of an x-wing!”

“Still counts.”

 _Like you’re one to talk._ Zeb almost teased, but he snorted instead. “Alright, babe.” A self-indulgent grasp of blond hair and soft kiss to the top of his head, and Zeb smiled. "Whatever you say."

**Author's Note:**

> For all the wonderful comments and Kudos and support I've gotten throughout the course of KAW 2020, thank you all so much. Seeing such positive wonderful feedback brings me so much joy and I appreciate it more than I can say. <3 <3


End file.
